Skip to main content

もえもえ

A review of Rumble Roses XX: I Feel All Tingly Mama!, a game which caused the Japanese rate-of-purchase of Xbox 360s to triple:
Extras include unlockable costumes and humiliations for Queen’s matches, concept art and the like, create a character mode, and photo mode. Create a character is like Weird Science only you don’t have to wear underwear on your head unless you want to and every woman you create looks pretty much the same except for hair and skin color. Photo mode is just what it sounds like. All the joy of taking pictures of half naked women cavorting together without those nasty restraining orders and sex offender lawn signs. You can even share the pics online with other men who are still recovering from fervent masturbation.

You can play the game online, but the one time I tried no one was using voice chat out of what I can only imagine was a strong sense of shame.

Having played the original Rumble Roses, playing the sequel is much like leaving your girlfriend for a supermodel. Sure, she looks much prettier, but after awhile you realize there is nothing inside of any real value or substance. Really makes you appreciate what you’ve left behind.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

dan simmons’ fiction

“I came back for my own purposes,” said the Time Traveler, looking around my booklined study. “I chose you to talk to because it was . . . convenient. And I don’t want you to do a goddamned thing. There’s nothing you can do. But relax . . . we’re not going to be talking about personal things. Such as, say, the year, day, and hour of your death. I don’t even know that sort of trivial information, although I could look it up quickly enough. You can release that white-knuckled grip you have on the edge of your desk.” I tried to relax. “What do you want to talk about?” I said. “The Century War,” said the Time Traveler. I blinked and tried to remember some history. “You mean the Hundred Year War? Fifteenth Century? Fourteenth? Sometime around there. Between . . . France and England? Henry V? Kenneth Branagh? Or was it . . .” “I mean the Century War with Islam,” interrupted the Time Traveler. “Your future. Everyone’s.” He was no longer smiling. Without asking, or offering to pour me any, he ...
8 comments
Read more

McDS, or, “losing my religion with bbc”

BBC NEWS: Nintendo in McDonald’s wi-fi deal Nintendo has joined forces with McDonald’s to offer free wireless internet access in the US for its DS handheld games console. The service means McDonald’s customers will be able to play selected DS titles against other gamers around the globe. Rivals Sony and Microsoft already offer online gaming on their game consoles. Could that last sentence be any less without point? Could it be any more misleading? It makes Nintendo sound like they are pulling up to the game late. It reads like they are responding to something that Microsoft and Sony have established. It’s not. What Sony and Microsoft have, in their home consoles is the ability to connect one’s home system to one’s existing internet service. So these are stationary machines in people’s homes that they can connect to the internet service they are already paying for on their own. With Sony’s PSP, and its built-in 802.11g wireless capability,...
7 comments
Read more

Tony diTerlizzi and classic D&D monsters

The sixth entry of his series on drawings of classic D&D monsters is up. He's one of my favorite fantasy artists. His work tends toward the charming and cozy, rather than others' focus on machismo or melodrama.
Post a Comment
Read more